Something
happens as you age. Your memory isn’t what it used it to be, although you can
remember the name of your three kindergarten teachers and your best friend in
second grade but draw a total blank when you run into someone at the mall you
haven’t seen in three months. You can also remember the lyrics to songs you
listened to in high school; you can often even recall where you were and who
you were dating when you first heard the song.
But
aging isn’t just about memory, or realizing that your grandmother wasn’t an
idiot for claiming her bones were predicting a weather change (scientists now
say it has to be with feeling the change in barometric pressure). Or you hair
thinning. Or your back surprising you one day by instructing you that you can’t
pick up things the way you did when you were 19.
And
more: I’ve mentioned before that art is becoming more important, which is
apparently not unusual in Western culture, or at least American culture. You
look upon your grandchildren completely differently than you looked upon your
children.
In
some strange way, you seem to focus more. You notice less but you see more. You
understand more.
It
is all these associations of aging that permeate Joseph Hesch’s Penumbra: The Space Between, his first
collection of poetry. He understands he’s looking at the world differently. It
was as if he awakened one morning and discovered he had unexpectedly
experienced a metamorphosis, less traumatic that the one described by Kafka but
perhaps just as profound.
It
is an unsettling feeling. But it is also a gift. What before would have been
barely noticing a young couple walking on the sidewalk in a poor section of
town becomes something almost magical.
Silent Night in Arbor Hill
I
saw them emerge from the shadow of shadows
that
blanketed the alley connecting
Orange
Street to Sheridan Avenue,
a
vacant-eyed lane of abandoned houses
you
wouldn’t wish to travel in
well-strapped
daylight. Into the hazy edge
of
a lemon-light circle beneath the lone
strobing
street light they edged,
this
young couple and their baby,
Behind
him, the young man dragged
a
shopping trolley that held a suitcase,
some
groceries and a few presents.
The
young woman held her infant close
against
her breast to protect it—
from
the cold of the city, I couldn’t judge—
as
the snow decided it was its time.
As
I drove past, upon the railings
of
the darkened doorways, tiny lights
blinked
and from within one a familial
brightness
shone as they entered.
A
once-a-year peace came over all
of
us in that place, at that time,
and
I thought “What a fine night,”
that
silent night in Arbor Hill.
Many
of the poems are like this, telling surprising stories from what at first
appear to be rather ordinary situations: a walk along the beach, the last snow
of winter, an old photograph, the heat of summer, a flock of birds, a harvest
moon, fog in the morning, an empty liquor in the gutter of the old
neighborhood. The poet is becoming more focused, noticing less but seeing more.
What
Hesch is discovering is the sacred of the ordinary, which is, of course, the
best and most profound gift of aging. And these poems in Penumbra give us that sacredness.
Photograph by George Hodan via Public
Domain Pictures. Used with permission.
Maybe I can find this at the college library near me - sounds wonderful.
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